Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Back on the Hilltop (or trying)



I wanna write but I can't, so I'm hiding in the abstract
Tossing and turning, tryin' to get back on track
Big plans I have, but its all dying in my head
Lazy and uncaring, everything has turned to lead

I know what is my toil, signs are everywhere
But when I approach, there arises this fear
Eventually, from the depths I know I must call
For a little help from the creator of it all

I used to write, and feel you flowing through my pen
You crafted each word, you told me what, how and when
But I took you for granted, and left you in the dust
Gone went all my creativity, my pen turned to rust

I keep thinking, just sit down and write and write
But its you I must face, to give my writing its light
Because on a hilltop, its only with you that I flourished
But I let you out of sight, my soul got undernourished

Look at me - rhyming poetry, so lame!
But I abandoned you, so I fully take the blame
So now I'm reaching for you, want you back, want you back
Fill all those spaces and holes where you and I know that I lack

I remember a time knowing you wanted me to write
You weren't the only one telling me, 'keep spreading the light'
But to have what to share, I gotta plug into the source
I'm telling you now, I'll get back on course

I forgot the mission, while it tugged on my core
It was really you saying, "From you I want more"
I'm here now listening, you won't have to say it again
Just come again and tell me, what, how and when

23 comments:

Mottel said...

Welcome Back . . . Looking forward to seeing posts from the new and improved Mimi!

chanie said...

Welcome back. (If you don't mind [the criticism and the request both], make your header smaller.)

Mottel- new and improved?!

Mottel said...

What, a chasunah shouldn't make a person better? :-P
I meant new and improved in the sense that after a break, a person comes back better then ever.

I just looked at the new Live from the Hilltop banner . . . trippy!

Mimi said...

Thanks for the greetings oh fellow bloggers.

Mottel, getting married definitely makes a person better...but not a better and more active writer! You still have to get off your behind and DO! Which apparently has taken me three months and a week and a day and a few hours... :)

Hopefully you're right and I am new and improved...

cma said...

thanx for coming back! i missed u!! :)

le7 said...

Hey well welcome back I guess? I always read and never commented.

But at least your hiatus/lack of inspiration was for a good reason.

Chana said...

Yay! A new post :)

chanie said...

Mottel- It should, but lav davka does it, and lav davka does it help the writing.

LE7- Wait...if she lacked inspiration after getting married, what does that say?!

temmi said...

oh my mim is back :) yay can't wait for more posts, and actually will just send u an email with more of my thoughts...

Cheerio said...

welcome back!!
had to say - despite being a rhyming piece, it was pretty dang good :)
and even better, it really spoke to my own struggle to get myself writing... at least you have an awesome excuse!
looking forward to what's coming now that you're back!

Anonymous said...

thank you, thank you, thank you... i also read but never commented. glad you're back:)

Mimi said...

Thanks everyone! I'm especially excited to see a few readers who usually never comment. I hope you continue!

Chanie, its multi-faceted. The lack of inspiration for writing was happening way before getting married (I mean look at the blog!). But perhaps also there is something very calm and settling about marriage that erases that intense struggle that used to get me to write...

Either way, I'm still going with Mottel in the hopes I am back "new and improved" :)

Anonymous said...

Welcome Back!! looking forwards to ur amazing posts flowing forth...

Raizel said...

And the pen journey continues sista.' I'm proud of you. "Don't know where but I've got to got to go there" You're on the way to your promised land :) Much love and encouragement

shalhevet said...

BS"D
you have a way of looking at things
that is mamash refreshing and continuously
inspiring. the way you think mim i love!
it could be anything really, u have a way
with words girl.
and i cannot believe u live in Eretz Yisrael!
miss you tons!

chanie said...

Yes, I know it's multifaceted, lol. And, of course, suspected that either you were getting engaged, or experiencing a frustrating dry spell.

But as long as you're back... :)

lars s. said...

did you paint this??

ISchier said...

BS"D

Welcome back!

Good to see you again - really missed the Hilltop!

But still, like I said, if you feel you have moved on, we'll miss you but we understand. If you feel it is still your avoida of course we'd be a lot happier!

My evil twin whom you may remember is too busy with his own blog this Adar/Purim to mess around here LOL!

Altie said...

Though I havn't followed your blog from the start, I have skimmed it from time to time, and liked what I saw. I noticed you have not written in a while, and I'm happy to see that you are back on the ball. As a fellow write, I know how frustrating a mental block is, especially as long as 3 months. Just always remember who you are writing for, and never feel pressured to write just because you know people are expecting to see it. Write for you, and for G-d, and everyone else will reap the benifit of that.

You don't know me, but I write a blog too. The adress is
from-the-holy-land.blogspot.com and I'd be very happy if anyone checked it out. I started it recently, and its not very known, besides for family and friends, who are my loyal supporters.

Anyway, I like your poem, and encourage you to try and write more. Even if you write something and dont like it, and it never gets on the blog, at least your writing.
Good luck,
Altie

ChayAiz said...

gosh i was beginning to lose hope
what a relief

Rabbi Lars Shalom said...

i think i wortte you befoer

Pia said...

id say ur back... cant wait to hear more

Anonymous said...

BS"D

G-d helps